crying james bond...the new age man

                                                  I always liked james bond movies and i think most men would like it  ---for it has all three which men want ---action ,fast cars and beautiful women . But as i grew older and saw them again i started watching the transition in many subtle things in these movies . I still remember in  one of them i think "Man with the golden gun" in which james bond played by Roger Moore 30 years back puts one girlfriend in the cupboard when he is surprised by another girlfriend and then sleeps with the latter ...
Though that promiscuity hasnt changed over the years in james bond movies (have u seen a happily married james bond ?? )  in recent years i am seeing him more reflective and sensitive

In recent movies James bond has started showing his sensitive side which was not shown in earlier movies . Pierce Bronson in one of the movies a few years back   is seen looking at the distance  with a look  which shows seriousness and vulnerability in front of his girlfriend by the seaside .
 "After all this violence and killing you feel lonely dont you  ?  "  . she asks him after a long silence . Our james bond who without a flinch shoots his enemy doesnt cover his emotions . Having seen all the james bond movies this scene is unique and says something about not only the changing face of james bond but also the changing face of modern male .  (many movies partially reflect the changing society  )

I have many friends of all age groups . Over the years i have seen the testesterone charged men replaced by the sensitive person who is fine with his emotions . " Boys dont cry "-- :  But i am seeing increasingly men especially the 20+ group who do cry .

"Sir , when i relocated to a big city ..one day i felt so bad that i cried ":  person 1 . He is as manly as any other person of his age . But without a flinch he is discussing this in front of not only me but a group of 4 men .

Another person , another place
"Brother , I broke up with my girlfriend ...Cried a lot  ..." : person 2
" Its ok " and casually asked hows she now
" Brother i cried  ...She didnt cry  "

Both these persons are known to me  and if you think they are the exceptions in todays 20 +  agegroup  you are wrong . Maybe all dont cry but these days these "young men " are in touch with their sensitive side  .

And i think thats a big welcome move from men for it addresses the commonest complaint of women of yesteryears :  Men are insensitive  .  And what about the modern women " Are they sensitive  ?  "  .
Go figure : )  i have got my answers  :)

chennai auto --- a survival guide

"100 Rupees Sir "  ... With greatest respect an auto driver is telling his charges . I looked back in respect at the great man who is telling his fare with "Sir " which is unique to chennai  . Then i looked ahead at the destination . It was just one  signal away and from the distance i could see the destination .

"Thank you Sir ". I replied back and walked in the midday sun thinking that this short distance of 5 minute brisk walk will add to my gym workout . Behind me i could hear tamil ? badwords /cursing/crying . Welcome to the world of the notorious chennai auto drivers who respectfully cheat the passengers in broad daylight . You may be asking me hey which world you are living man ... autodrivers always overcharge in india . I know that having travelled extensively in india . But chennai autowalas are the masters of this art and the undisputed leaders in cheating passengers of their hard earned money .

I am not an expert in haggling and i value peace of mind over money so i have my own unique way of handling them which may or may not be useful to you  ...

1.  Never catch a standing auto from an autostand . Always catch a running auto. A standing auto in an autostand always reminds me of going into the middle of a lion pride who is looking for an easy snack .

2. Never catch the first auto unless he tells the reasonable exact fare (which you should have an idea of course )  . If he tells double the fare walk away immediately .

3 Never haggle too much (my personal opinion ) .  Dont get shocked . My point is if you haggle too much your entire journey will be filled with his tales of his ailing wife who is pregnant and this 10 rupees reduction due to haggling has made irreparable damage in his finances in taking care of his wife  . I am not interested in a half an hour tale of someone elses wife . 

4  . Dont be in a hurry to catch an auto . Spend a minute and skip from auto to auto and soon (most of the time ) you will find a decent man who tells the exact fare or at least fairly close to it  . Of course as in everywhere there are honest people but in chennai autos they are the minority thats all

5 . Haggle in your search but not too much and always walk in opposite direction to autos so that they wont follow you and pester you..

And there is two other ways : book a cab (though its not an instant solution )  or take bus (i dont like it )  or walk in chennai sun (not a good way to tan )  . 

                                                                  If you save money by these tips dont forget to treat me .. my number is ............:) 

The man from the mountains-- from Munnar

My grandfathers brother passed away yesterday . He had a good life and was lucky enough to live where he liked ---Munnar . You and me go to Munnar and i have yet to see one person who is not in love with Munnar  in kerala the mountainous , place filled with beautiful tea estates . And he was fortunate enough to live his life there and that too with the girl of his dreams .

I visited him first when i was a child and i still remember the first site of a double barrel gun which he showed me . In addition he had rifle . For a young boy of 7 years not only was i thrilled in seeing this uncle who lived proper Englishman style in the middle of a tea estate but also was thrilled by the guns he had . And you may ask why he had guns . Munnar was not the munnar of today with the buzzling tourist . Those days wild animals used to come near the house and elephants were a real menace . (Even now occasionally in some parts )  . Also long ago he was a hunter . He has told us his near brushes with death and instead killed leopard , bear etc . That was long back  .  On my last visit a few months back i asked him where his guns were . He told the times have changed and he has got only one for his personal protection .Rest he gave back to the government  long back .  And showed me the 0.22 calibre one he had .

                                                                   Another impressive thing he did  was he married the girl of his dreams  . Whenever  anyone  tells me about the short shelflife of inter-religious marriage  i laugh inside for immediately  so many  faces  of my cousins and uncles come in front of me  ( who have successful interreligious and interracial marriages  )  . But the record -holder is this uncle whose marriage with a girl from Andhra pradesh who belonged to another religion lasted more than 50 years . And on my last visit a few months back  he called me and told a few family personal matters .  And one thing he stressed was the great support he had from this wife of his  in his joys as well as sorrows  .  50 years of happy married life --impressive  .

Going as a tourist is one thing but living at munnar breathing a fresh mountain air everyday .,leading an adventurous life and drinking fresh tea is entirely a different matter . Though he was against rampant  tourism  (dont hate him for this  , he has his opinion because according to him the tourism was disproportionate to the ecosystem )  my heart goes for his spirit  -- the  man from the mountains  .

Death.....why it evokes mixed emotions ?

                                                 One of my favourite malayalam writer Poonathil Kunjabdulla has written

"  When my mother died  when i was a child  , i didnt cry  ..because i didnt  know what was  death  "
"When my father  died  when i was an adult , then also i didnt cry ....because  i  knew  what was death "

                                                                       There are few things  which people dont like to discuss  and one of the prominent ones is death  .  Maybe its the false hope that  by not discussing it  we will live forever  .
There was even a discovery tv program showing  why death and people associated with it is pushed to the backstage . Only  when it is romanticized in literature (fiction)  it has at least some respectability  . But the fact remains  that  though its the inevitable end of everyone including you and me , the topic is relegated to the backstage  .

                      No , i am not going to do an extensive brainstorming on this topic but a few little thoughts on this  .  For one , if you are intensely religious (which many people claim they are  )  the death when it comes should not evoke this much fear . For , it is the time when God calls the person back to him .I have witnessed many times people doing intense prayers before getting into a vehicle .  They have the false belief that their prayers will prevent an accidental death . If they have true belief why should they fear death and why should they try to bribe God by praying to prevent death .  I think that is hypocrisy .

I usually dont attend funerals unless the person is very close to me (Yes , you read that correctly  ... very close means who is very close to my heart  )  . Of course that included my grandmothers and my moms brother (he was only 54 when he died  )   .  I am extremely fortunate that none of my friends or close relatives  died in their prime except my moms brother .  Being very pious himself  i think he wouldnt have minded when he was called by his creator at that age .  (he died of a heart attack )  . That was one of the few occasions when we all  carried the body (yes we used to do that in our native place  using shoulder carried equipment  )      . And though i dont believe in shedding tears to show people , it was a rude shock when one of my distant relative and a person of my age was trying to discuss some random topic like the cinema playing on the local theatre . Of course i ignored him  .  This person i have often seen always at the forefront to attend or organise any funeral /marriage  . (i dont know what his excitement is ?? )

                                                                           And before closing :  In medical college some people refuse to get admitted in some beds apparently because one week ago another person has died in that bed .  We used to find it funny that irrespective of the bed in all beds of medical college some person has died sometime . Why fear death when that is the inevitable  . As some famous person told :

Death is more universal than life; everyone dies but not everyone lives.
             

karikk(tender coconut ) cutting doctor

Recently i was forced to climb a coconut tree (only  9 feet  )  because  after bangladesh trip  i was very thirsty for the tender coconut kerala drink .  Also my cousin also wanted it so i personally made sure that  i plucked the good ones from the tree .

Unlike an apple or an orange , once you get it the process of getting inside the tasty liquid (tender coconut water ) and the white tender coconut pieces is a herculean task unless you know the right technique of cutting the 2 inch thick shell . Highly intelligent as i am :)  i spent almost  half an hour cutting,struggling ,blaming (ya... i blamed the huge knife for  its lack of sharpness )  and finally got  inside one  .  As i tiredly started on the second "fruit "  the coconut feller a 70 year old man  suddenly came (he was away on another assignment and hence i tried my luck because of intense thirst  ).


He stared at me and looked at what i was doing  .  Son , why are you struggling with the coconut  ??  You should have felled the "tender coconut "  .  After an hour of my struggle i am realising my mistake which for him just took just 1 second .  Coconut plucking is not rocket science and doesnt require complicated formulas but this reinstated my belief in "specialisation " and "experience "  .  In that particular thing  this old man had  50 years of experience while i had just one coconut felling experience .

                                                                      The point is we should always understand that experts are experts and especially in fields like medical care its very important that experts are always consulted  . I see many times when some  people consult other equally ignorant people on medical matters .  Though for  simple  illnesses like common cold  this is ok its worrying when people believe  what other laymen say about illnesses and their treatment  . All this because they want to save money and time in going to an expert .
And  dont think  that  "Just MBBS "  people are not needed  .  In many illnesses  they  are also having much more expertise than most of the laymen  .  And they are able to guide you in going to the appropriate specialist  .   So next time when you need a radiologists assistance or a technical expert in ct scans  or medical software contact me  but for heavens sake  dont  make me climb up a tree  :)   for plucking tender  coconut  .....

Albert Einstein marrying marilyn monroe and doing door to door sales ..personality test

Albert Einstein is one of the greatest scientists . Though his teachers found him dumb he proved what is genius thanks to his great flair for science . And E=mc^2 thrills me even when i think about the concept of small amount of matter getting converted to so much energy  ...

Now for a moment imagine if Albert Einstein became a salesman --- a door to door salesman or even a big corporate sales head .  Will he be successful ?  And to make matters worse if he has Marilyn Monroe as his wife who has her own aspirations out of life which is far different from him  ... Anyway Einstein was lucky that he didnt choose a career which he was not fit for and didnt marry a girl who was not his wavelength  .  (Marilyn is my wavelength :)  )

The point is however good /smart you are the most important thing is understand yourself and proceed . I have been fortunate to understand myself fairly well thanks not only to my friends and relatives who point out my strengths and weaknesses but also an honest look into myself and seeing my strengths and weaknesses .
(You want to know about my weaknesses :)  that will be in my next blog :)  )  .

A few days back i did a personality test based on Kiersey and Myers Briggs on the internet . I was happy that the analysis that it give me read very correct for me . Not that i didnt know many of it  but when some test also gives further insight into yourself you feel doubly sure that you are on the right road .  It was not a magical test which gives you the best career / the best girl who will fit you . But it gives you an idea of your "wavelength  "  .  I write this because many of the people i meet find this concept of " wavelength " very confusing . But this test in its explanation even included this term which was great .

I am not saying you should choose everything depending on some random test . But these also can give some  idea on yourself in your search for self discovery . Though i have some skill in hand reading and i am amazed at the intense interest people have in it inspite of 0 scientific evidence for it , its high time that we spend a little time in assessing ourselves at least for amusement sake..

psychopaths on the loose ...do something about it

There was jack the ripper the notorious serial killer of london who used to kill women specifically prostitutes one after the another . There were many serial killers after that in various time periods . One thing they all had in common was they were all psychopaths --- who had a morbid enjoyment in killing .

                                                                Facebook being a social media is full of interesting pics be it the lovely photographs taken by DSLR or cute thoughts ,quotations etc . People like and comment about them .
But last few days i am finding a few very disturbing pictures posted on facebook . Being a doctor i am not shocked by the pictures per se but by the sick minds which post these pictures on facebook . last week i saw one photograph of autopsy posted on facebook . Autopsies belong to the autopsy (postmortem ) table . They are done for a purpose to find the cause of death and in many cases to find how death occured so that the true culprit is narrowed down. But the sick person who has posted it has done it for "enjoyment " and whats even more shocking was the ghastly comments like "superb" etc by his/her friends .

Today i saw another posted by another psychopath in which a young girl is lying face down with her head smashed and brain partially exposed . Such a gruesome scene i havent seen in my life before . This picture posted by another psychopath also had some comments by his /her "friends "  all excited about the scene .

Its one thing to post these pictures on facebook and passing uncivil comments on facebook . But it is high time that such things are reported immediately using the report tool in facebook and also identify these psychopaths  (hopefully  rare  ??  )  and try to get them treated or at least cordoned off  ..  If you look around you  , though you may not see  psychopathic killers you may identify rarely such people who find thrill in suffering of other people .  If they cant be treated at least we should make sure they are properly identified and ostracized  .  

india bangladesh relations

One of my student a young technician in his 20s   who has travelled 400 kms to be an observer while i was teaching in Dhaka bangladesh :

" Sir we love india  "  ( I feel proud )  (They are giving my country great respect .)

" Sir , why every year in the border BSF is killing bangladeshi people as of today 100 numbers "

Me : No answer

I look at his face  ....  Its not one of pointing fingers in anger  . Its of helplessness

"Sir is it because we are poor country  "

Me : No answer  ...  (Unfortunately its true the killings as i read in the newspaper at least once during my 5 day stay  )


It is said that travelling opens your  eyes and ears and removes the last vestiges of your false pride .  I am still proud of my country india  (in a good way )  but  i understand that there is tremendous scope for improvement in its relationship with neighbours  .  We who criticise US foreign policy for certain actions fail to realise how our actions as a country is perceived by our neighbours . Seeing the "beautiful " people of Bangladesh i am really shocked that india could deal like this to Bangladesh especially  when india had a crucial role in getting Bangladesh freedom in 1971 .

As another Senior person put it " We want india not as our friend but as our Big brother  "  ... But not as Master  .  And unlike many criticisms i have heard in my homeland these two people were very clear that they were expressing their opinion knowing fully well that I am not to blame for indian foreign policy  .

There is tremendous scope for indian involvement in Bangladesh science technology progress , i mean potential  .  Not as a rich neighbour  but as a big brother whose economy may not be as strong as india but whose people are so loving towards indians .  If they can treat me  like a king why  cant we reciprocate and do good to them ?

woman on top --- dirty picture --- movie review

Airhostess :  Sir , Veg or non-veg ?
Me :  No reply
Airhostess :  Sir, veg or non-veg ?  (Now she is also peering into the tv screen on the jetairways flight from Dhaka to india )
Me : Oh, I am sorry .  Non -veg  .  Thank you  ...

I am seeing a movie on the jet airways tv screen carefully selected for its popularity by jetairways ... the Dirty Picture starring Vidya Balan .  And that particular scene invoved she on top of Nazirudeen shah the male protagonist in a steamy bedroom  scene  . Whole movie is full of double meanings and maybe i have hardly watched :)  any western movies with depictions of such scenes this movie is the limits  ..

Now dont  think that i am a conservative person asking why its a mainstream movie  . I am strongly for strong themed movies and i am for depicting sexuality for what it is  .   (Which these days amply do  :  be it hindi or malayalam )  .

Dirty picture is not a dirty movie (depending on your mindset of course )   Actually its a movie about a girls ambitions to get into big screen and the path through which she hits the big screen but  in a different role . It tells about the fundamental ambition of many human beings to be famous and more importantly about the need to be loved .  Though a B-movie actress she has many affairs in each of which she looks for true love . It also shows her meteoric rise to stardom and  equally pathetic downfall . The direction is superb , vidya balans acting is brilliant ( i find it even better than Kahaani  )  and the dialogues even though some had double meanings  were superb . There was one scene in which she is awarded best actress of some sort award in which she lights a cigarette on the podium and gives a fantastic speech directed towards the soceitys hypocrisy and double standards .

As a movie critic i was looking for one flaw in this movie to do an internal rating and put my rating on imdb.com . And i couldnt find any  ...Except that this movie is not suitable for children to watch and so many "grown up adults " whose mindset is more conservative than a 1 year old  ..  This is the same country where my favourite actor Richard Gere had a tough time from the moral policemen  for planting a kiss on Shilpa shettys "cheek "  .  And this movie which shows enough and more is a mainstream movie  .

Dear Jetairways : please make an announcement before serving food that our airhostess is coming so please  start watching cartoons till she goes away  .. :)

From bangladesh with love :)

I am a different tourist . For one i travel "officially "  but thoroughly enjoy each country or place i visit . And secondly i am a person who loves a place more for its people than all its attractions combined .

To be honest i was not looking forward much for my Dhaka trip . Having gone to Sri lanka which is similar to south india  in many ways i was expecting dhaka to be similar to west bengal . But from the hearty welcome  at the immigration counter i was "at home "
                                                          I meant i was treated extremely warmly by all the people i met .
Having passed through immigrations in germany , china and kuwait the immigration clearance here took me just 10 minutes and the smiling officer asked only one question " You are from kerala ?  Great place "  Smiled , stamped the passport and that was it .  I felt i was visiting a next door neighbour than a strange land .

Changing money into the local currency Taka was good . For compared to indian rupee you get more value for money here . I put my mental calculator in reverse mode .  (1 euro= rs 70 while 1 euro =100 taka approx )  .  I stayed at Ruposhi bangla in the heart of Dhaka. (Ruposhi Bangla hotel  : on tripadvisor needs a separate review by itself )  .

My work involved training the doctors and ct technologists at Bangladeshs premier neuro institute . In my evenings i visited the local shops , Dhaka university  etc and met some very nice people . Now you may ask me " Dr arent you living among nice people "  Please read again :  I wrote i met "very " nice people and i mean it  . Where should i begin :

I am neither the senior most doctor in india  or the chief of army staff .. But when the seniormost radiologist of Bangladesh stands up to meet me and speaks to me with genuine respect and talks to me like an old friend    though we have just met  says a lot about them .  Is he an exception ? No

When another senior person both in age and social status who is a PhD from Japanese university welcomed me warmly and had a heart to heart discussion on religion , india-bangladesh relations , his student days in japan etc and who was so persistent in offering me "tea "  . I never knew bangladeshi tea had a cumpulsory accompaniment of hot samosas(the very best ) and even crispy chicken fry  .  To a bewildered me (it was 6 pm only ) he explained in Bangladesh be it the rich or the poor hospitality is very important  .  If you visit an extremely poor farmers house even if he didnt have anything to give he will at least offer the farm produce in his house .  And to top it all this senior person was a Bangladeshi freedom fighter who had participated in  bangladeshi liberation movement of 1971  .

A pretty girl i met  (did i say pretty  ?  She was very pretty  :)  )  was very nice . Though we didnt discuss bangladeshi foreign policy , though a stranger she was very down to earth and was very intelligent in her conversations . And why i told nice because she too was very warm and friendly . But a down to earth pretty stranger who became a friend reiterates my belief that  this country  is  filled with many warm friendly people


And did i tell you i ran off from  a dinner invitation tonight ?  I was already full with hospitality by one person while another is offering me dinner  ...Cmon I AM A STRANGER  :)

Coming from  a hospitable culture (India )  i realised for the first time that there were friendlier and more hospitable people than us in this planet ... That includes bangladesh  ...