dracula.. movie review

I hate horror movies .. though i love action movies . Thinking about it, in both there is blood but in horror movies there is no sylvester stallone or arnold . Only the hero who makes an appearance after the sun sets and drains blood from the victims .
But ... one of my favourite and only favourite horror movie is dracula . Why ? because movie  dracula(1992)  is different . 
                                                                 Count Dracula, in the movie, unlike many horror movie heroes  has a personality of his own . Unlike vampires who straight away go for the victims carotid artery this Count in the initial part of movie was protecting Jonathan Harker in his castle from other vampires as he wanted Jonathan to help him  get a land deal in London where the  Count wanted to go .That is an intelligent and calculative vampire .  The story has an excellent plot and a narration style as taken from the diaries of Jonathan Harker, a lawyer , who visited his client Count Dracula  . It is scary yes , with some scenes which can potentially give a sleepless night (after all its horror  movie) . But if you are brave (like me sometimes:) )  this movie you will enjoy . There is even Sir Antony Hopkins ( Silence of the Lambs fame ) as Professor Van Helsing who helps Jonathan in his fight against the great Count Dracula . The photography and film sets are beautiful and the Victorian era is beautifully pictured in the movie . Overall  a  classic movie .

Haroon h marikar

                                                        
                                          

101 things to do before you die

                                                Recently i saw an internet list where a person has listed what all things he wanted to do before he died . No its not about writing a will , finish all the debts if any etc etc . Its about a few things you want to do which you have to prioritize to make sure that we accomplish as many of these as possible . Its not a competition , for no one is gonna give a prize if you accomplish the 101 things . But the positive thing about this list is that there will be less number of " I should haves" when you can actually do many of these things only if you prioritize them . These lists are personal (doesnt mean you have to hide them ) but means a list for one person may not be 1 percent related to another ones . Here goes mine a few of them which you can also copy if you are interested and suggest things to me if you have interesting ones . Recently i met a couple who quit their job and are on a southeast asian tour for 6 months . Its not to be copy-pasted by all but it is an interesting option for a select few . (  I admire them , but its not in my 101 things to do  ) . My list goes here :
1.  Learn latin dance :  Believe me , even if you are as clumsy as me on the dance floor it is a fantastic experience dancing to the rhythm of the sensuous salsa or bachata music . It is an ideal combination of listening to rhythmic music , exercise as well as meeting interesting people . My status : learnt the basics of salsa and tango now want to learn more
2. Learn a martial art : No its not promoting violence but actually preventing it .  Be it kungfu , taek won do or karate it gives a confidence in yourself which even a gym body doesnt give you .  Make sure that you choose one which you like and also a good guru .  My status : learnt karate for two years , kungfu for three months .  And in those three months gained the confidence which two years karate didnt give me . As i told earlier guru matters
3. learn driving :  most of us may be having a driving licence , but think back as its not only an essential skill but a learning not to be missed for the pure thrill of it .  To think about it crudely , you are travelling much faster than any running human being in full control of a highly complicated machine . As i told 101 things is not one like landing on the moon but seemingly simple things but which can be listed and achieved . Now without going further i will list a few more which i have achieved and many  i wish to do if i can before i die .
4. cook a complex dish like biriyani or crab curry
5. sing a song in front of an audience with an orchestra .  (dont have to be rafi for that )
6. look through the window during takeoff of plane (many have done it but all should )
7. be an entrepreneur ( need not be ambani, i had done a small book business while i was in college . the point is not to risk your savings but do a small business just for the sake of it ) .
8. act in a role in a movie or serial (it was the smallest role in a malayalam serial long ago , but it was fun while i did it .. just a scene in a tv serial  with my friends and sangeetha mohan around 10 years ago )
9 live in a foreign country at least for a week seeing the local culture
10 eat food which is diametrically opposite what you eat daily----for me sushi -- and i havent stopped
                                         there are many i want to do like
11 . to own a dog  --- with my travelling job my dog hating mother has told me you can buy it if you are at home for 30 days .. so the odds are good :)
12 . to learn a musical instrument : listening music is different from the thrill of making it  ..
13. to go to poland ... i want to visit the place where madame curie did all her fantastic experiments
...................i am stopping for now .............. pls tell me yours
regards dr haroon marikar 

An evening in mumbai

                                                                      During my recent visit to mumbai i had a pleasant outing with a couple from Poland . They were on a world tour and though a foodie and a mini travel freak i was suddenly worried . My worry was where will i meet them?  . I represented india to them and my spicy yoko sizzler may put a hole in their stomach and make their india experience a visit to the emergency room .
                                                                       But with a little thought our evening was a great one with holes neither in their stomachs nor on our purses . The day started at 3 pm in the evening . It being a sunday and it being mumbai the 3 pm in mumbai is equivalent to the morning of any other city .  I suggested Leopold Cafe at Colaba . In this way they could at least be at home in this place which has non spicy things in their menu . This cafe which was started in 1871 is iconic of Colaba of south mumbai . It serves predominantly continental food and the ambience suits people visiting from abroad where they feel comfortable before plunging into the great indian masala ...And true to the great cafe culture there is no time pressure to clear the tables for the next guest
Since we had all had lunch we had chocolate cake and banana lassy which was really tasty . And we spent almost an hour there talking about their world tour . Towards  the end of the talk , i scared them , for i told them this was the cafe where the terrorists did their shooting many years ago . And to prove it i asked the doorwoman to show the bullet markings still preserved on the walls .
                                  We walked to the gateway of india the spectacular monument just 5 minutes away and in the pleasant weather saw so many ships anchored in the port . Even a naval destroyer ship was on site and it was great . We took a taxi to the marine drive or the queens necklace . They were amazed at the taxifare of 1 dollar from colaba to marine drive---yes mumbai taxis are cheap . I also told them about the iconic yellow and black taxis of mumbai which the drivers were not ready to give up though 30 years old . (most repairs they could do by themselves) . After photos with the iconic car of mumbai we strolled through the beautiful marine drive with all the huge buildings which would become the shining gems of queens necklace at night . We sat at the beach and here they were very happy , for it was less tourists and more of the local people . And there were people selling chai for a few rupees and lady with monkey , and the friendly locals asking where they are from etc .The road nearby had flashy bmws with guys sticking their heads out through sunroof and for the first time i saw even a bullock cart in south mumbai . They were very happy to see the india with the mixture of east and west . Soon the sun , was setting and it was a lovely sight . And soon one by one the buildings started switching their lights on and within an hour the gems in the queens necklace was dazzling . This place is truly the best part of mumbai .

We walked back past old gothic churches and the airline offices and reached colaba again and i showed them the Eros theatre . We were soon at Bade Miya the famous roadside foodstall in colaba . They mentioned that they liked spicy food . So no stomach holes to worry we went to bade miya and had an awesome dinner of sheek kabab , mutton boti and rumali roti . The guy making rumali was throwing the roti in  air like a shawl . They enjoyed the meal very much .

We spent another hour at the colaba which was now lit up showing south mumbai in all its glory . Soon we parted ways with memory of a nice evening . So next time you are in mumbai , take a cab and go to Colaba and think about all the filmstars who might have come here in the years before .

little thoughts on blogging or why i blog

Yesterday night i met my cousins cousins in mumbai . After pleasantries two of them told they are reading my blog . I was happy and one of them commented that my blog is about travel . I told her though some are about travel its primarily about my viewpoints or little thoughts . And today i was reading a blog of a cousin of mine in which she has discussed in detail her personal life . Though in this increasingly diplomatic world being honest your feelings and thoughts maybe inadvisable(depending on your perspective)  i firmly believe at least in my case that is the best way to be really "human " with all its many positives and as many negatives .
                                                          So to make myself clear to my cousins cousin todays blog is neither about travel nor about food . Its about relationships .You must all have read the famous story of two friends and the bear .
                                                                       Vijay and Raju were friends. On a holiday they went into a forest. They were enjoying the beauty of nature. Suddenly they saw a bear coming at them. They were frightened.

Raju who knew climbing trees ran up to a tree and climbed up quickly. He did not think of Vijay. Vijay did not know tree climbing.

Vijay thought for a second. He had heard animals do not prefer dead bodies. He fell to the ground and held his breath. The bear sniffed him and thought he was dead. So, he went away.

Raju asked Vijay," What did the bear whisper into your ears?”

Vijay replied, "The bear asked me to keep away from friends like you" and went on his way.
                                                       Just like any story in childhood i never took it seriously . But as i grew up i understood why this story was very important for it taught me how to judge relationships not by their number but by their strength or depth . And life for most or rather all of us throws enough challenges in our path where though we have to face it ourselves a friend or a relative can come in handy . But this is where the problem comes . Its not when the going  is good that we are able to judge a true friend or a relative but when a crisis comes . Unfortunately for many the first crisis will be the worst because in addition to the crisis you realise that most of your friends and relatives are not friends but " just fellow travellers ".Like  our Raju and Vijay  in the story , when crisis strikes we , if we are observant , realise who are our real friends and relatives are . Though that process is quite painful , that understanding will help us deal with the future challenges in  life in a much better way .

Even seemingly unrelated mechanical things like cars tell the same story . Imagine for a moment you have two cars to test -- a maruti engine fitted in a bmw and a bmw engine fitted in a maruti (dont go over the technicals assume its possible )  . At steady speeds of 40 kms per hour there wont be any major difference .
Suddenly you see a wild elephant in your rearview mirror charging at 70 km per hour and quite close . You press down the accelerator hard . Any difference ?  Here though meek looking the bmw engined one will reach 300 kmph and save you from the wild elephant . Recently one of my friends who has 1000+ friends in facebook came to me when he had a crisis . We were able to discuss it and in the end i casually asked him didnt you mention this to any of your "friends" . He replied he didnt have any real friend . His is not an isolated case . So for those who are still reading this blog this far , let us be a real friend /relative for our friends . And let us not count our relationships by numbers ---unless we are planning to stand for election .

Comments are welcome
dr haroon marikar



                                                                  


                                                                                 
                                                                                      
                                       

Oh Calcutta

I recently visited Kolkata . Those who have not visited kolkata may have a picture of a great city with colonial buildings and some may have visions of a land where all people are equal after all this state was ruled by communist government for quite a long time .
                                                                  On a positive sense the land where i set foot is the place where great men like Netaji Subash Chandra Bose , Rabindranath Tagore , Mother Theresa lived . That makes this place truly great . And though i have interacted with a few bengalis they were quite unassuming , very friendly .
But all this doesnt make up for the state of Kolkata city . I wouldnt even call it a metro by any chance . Post independance while other cities grew inspite of corrupt politicians this city never grew . From the pan chewing prepaid taxi counter at the airport with the smoggy look of the roads the city gave more the look of a underdeveloped place . Even Tier 2 cities have better hotels and the red tape is so bad that when i asked for an autorickshaw for a 2 km ride it seems first kilometre you  have to go by one auto , get down and catch another auto as apparently they have "permits " . Consumer is not the king in this city .

In my former visits i had visited the Victoria memorial which is a nice colonial building in Kolkata . But other than that even the posh areas are nowhere near even tier 2 cities . The food compared to many parts of india is quite different as their cooking medium is different. None of my friends liked the food there but i being the foodie who believes everything should be eaten at least once tried it . And i tried it in Oh Calcutta the best place to try bengali food . For me , yes the food was very different but tasty especially the prawn served in coconut shell and the fish hilsa in mustard gravy .Just a point to note that Oh Calcutta is pretty expensive (meal for two 2500 Rs ) .

The return journey also scared me . Being used to airports like bus stations i was surprised to get an sms asking me to be at airport 3 hours prior . I called my colleagues who told me apparently that this airport had only two counters and always there is a long queue in the morning . Yes the rich and the poor in the same queue the communist way of making people equal . And the greatest moment was when waiting at the boarding gate there was a movement near me . Mind you , this was near the boarding gate after the security checks . Through sleepy eyes i looked and there was a cat in the airport . I didnt know whether to smile or think about the frustration Netaji must have had in seeing the city and the airport named after him .

my rajasthan visits and little thoughts

                                                     I had visited rajasthan twice and both visits were memorable . I will start with the second visit . It was to Chittorgarh . I had read in childhood about Rani padmini the queen of chittor who when she was confronted with the impending defeat at the hand of the treacherous Alauddin Khilji committed jauhar by jumping into burning fire with all the womenfolk and children . And true to rajput tradition the menfolk went into the final battle where they all died fighting rather than subjecting to capture by the enemy .
Rani padmini and her kingdom is no more but the fort of Chittor is still there in Rajasthan . And it is the largest fort in india .  The fort has to be seen for till date it is the most magnificient  thing i have seen in my life . Set atop
a huge hill the massive fort can be seen from many kilometres away .  And i feel , the architecture is so strong that it has stood the ravages of time like the proud rajput . Even today only an airforce attack can capture it and in that era there was no airforce . The  massive gate is as tall as two elephants height . And the gate is fitted with  huge iron spikes and the guide told us that it is to break the head of the elephant which tries to break in by ramming its head . As i told earlier the fort is set atop hills and any enemy foolish enough to climb the hill will be killed swiftly by the archers on the forts walls . And the forts walls also are huge .As i strained my neck to look at the fort ramparts only the small holes set obliquely were seen . The point is the archers can see you while you can see only the arrowhead .  (architecture is too good )  .Inside the fort there were all the amenities and at the height of its glory was so self sufficient that it had more than 100 water bodies in it .  I was curious to see an animal shelter which looked huge  and guide explained that it was the battle elephants resting place . Those who escape the archers had an excellent chance of getting crushed . Then there was the place where Alauddin khilji saw the reflection of rani padmini . It is designed in such a way that the place can only be seen by  a mirror while if you look directly nothing but a lake is seen. There are so many temples and huge 7 storey vijay stambh which one of the kings erected . Last but not the least the place where Rani committed jauhar with all the womenfolk . Since this was the fort of mewar kings the place had at least three times jauhar committed during different periods .

Another visit was to Kota Rajasthan but here though i could not visit any fort i was very impressed by the hospitality of the local rajputs .  Very friendly and smiling one of them a boy of around 18 showed me a video in his mobile phone . There are no wars now except for the rajput regiment . This guys video showed a goat running about in a compound surrounded by a group of people . Our friendly guy was holding a sword in his hand and after around five minutes with a single stroke the head of the goat was cut . He told me that it was part of the initiation for rajputs.

                                                I have travelled to many regions of india and in many places recently regionalism has taken hold . Its a fact that all parts of india have a long history and culture at par with any other region of india . No region is superior or inferior though many regions people feel they are in some way superior to the rest of india . According to me , only one region can claim superiority over any other part of india . That is the Rajputs of Rajasthan . For they only never gave in to their enemy and both the women and men didnt even fear death when their country or region was at stake . But still they never flaunt their rich past and claim superiority while they continue to extend their warm hospitality to people like me . And a visitor to many regions that is the true sign of belonging to a great cultural heritage .

P.S : If there is one place i want to visit again in india it is Rajasthan where petty politicians have not spoilt the mindset of people into thinking they are superior . Let it remain so in the land of Rana Pratap and Rani padmini

Dr Haroon H Marikar

why i love animals....

                                                   I love animals . There is no question about that . Not only i love animals i respect them too .  (more than many people :)  not a politically correct  statement ? )  Let me explain .
                                                                        Two years back my uncle had a cat. It was a half persian with long beautiful hair and being a cat had shorter but extremely sharp claws . Whenever i used to visit him i used to play with it and it being a very active cat used to hit me with its paws  playfully .  So many times i have played with it and picked it up in all its various moods . To test its limits i have even  tried to separate it from its feeding bowl (not to be tried )  .  But NEVER i repeat never was i scratched by it . Except once . That was when it fell off a ledge and i was the only person nearby to break its fall and that time i was hit by its claws . I still remember that moment , even then it was not a scratching deliberately  .  Many of my friends who are cat owners can vouch this cat behaviour.These  ultimate small members of the cat family which are head to foot designed to kill their prey act very gently with their human companion .  The same foot with razor sharp claws they know where to use and where not to . 

Ok, assume you dont have a cat  and you cant relate to the cat -human interaction . Watch animal planet  . Yesterday i was watching the elder member of the cat family the lion . Though not  at all a pet for the average owner , those who handle tame  lions and tigers opine that they show their softer side  (yes there is a softer side to these predators ) to their human handlers . Again the claws and canines which rip apart animals which weigh 10 times a human, like the cape buffalo,are not used when  they play with their owners with their big paws .  I have blogged about elsa the lioness earlier and that is not an isolated case ( pls watch animal planet--strongly recommended  )  .

Just this behaviour is enough for me to respect them  and learn from them . And there are many  more ...for instance ,they never kill 10 animals when they are hungry .They kill only one .  Eventhough they thrive on meat (they will die without it ) they dont kill more than they want  to escape from their hunger .

                           I know many wonderful people who are genuinely nice . But i have come across some who should learn many things from animals .  Let us take point number one  .  Even a lion knows when to retract its claws and use the same paw to hold a persons head in an embrace  (see Christian the lion youtube video )  . But think about how many people who are introduced as so and so at such and such a company or a successful professional and who maintain that attitude in the personal interactions outside the office hours  . This attitude which is appropriate and might be even helpful in their job , becomes a negative influence on people they meet outside the office say in a family function or a party or friendly visit  .  My point is if even my cat can retract its claws and interact positively without the attitude why cant we too copy that and be happy. 

Coming to the second point , we have people who have taken 16000 crores and 1 lakh crores as bribe .  Just compare what is the lion equivalent of that ? Killing the entire deer population of africa for a midday meal . How many lions do that and even if they do how will the other lions react . ? And what about the shooters ... who have killed many innocent people .   . . how many animals do random killing ?

All these bring to mind the question "Are we a superior species ? " . Are we ?

haroon h marikar


             
                                                                       
                                                                           

the omen ...or choose your newspaper wisely

                                       This is a unique kerala problem so my non-keralite friends can skip this post . But my nri friends who are mallu please read on  . 
                                                       Its a known belief that if a black cat crosses your way ill omen will fall you . I dont know what the poor cat had to do with this belief from olden times, but  the take home message is that in a journey the first thing that happens has a lasting good/bad influence on the journey .
                                                          Now coming to the newspapers . Whether we go for a jog or walk groggily to the bathroom for most of us the morning newspaper is one of the first things in the morning agenda . Most of the newspapers have catchy headlines in the first page and yes media has the habit of putting catchy things in the first page .  But here the newspapers of one of the most literate state stand apart from the rest .  Here, most of the days the negative things are put on the first page in bold and with a long write up .  Its common knowledge that accidents do happen , people commit suicide , politicians get caught for womanising etc  . But in 30  days ,  at least 15 days the front page news is regarding these three topics . As there is no dearth of accidents happening in the national highway there is always a  big picture of the mangled remains of the car ,a "nice" write-up  etc .  Whenever suicides happen it is there in the front page with all the details and the possible causes(media decides that also ) .  Womanising gets an equal opportunity  with many places in kerala made infamous by media by  womanising scandal . 

Kerala is not the only place where all these things happen . Accidents happen throughout the world , suicides also happen sometimes and some  politicians  are womanising   . But even in Kuwait when i was there ,( which is a  muslim country) whenever whoever is caught for womanising etc  that news is put in the third or fifth page .  In kuwait the accidents occur at much higher speeds and i  had seen one car twisted on itself  while i was there . But  it is hardly put in the first page  of Kuwait times which was  a very readable newspaper with the right mix of national and international news . The same with the newspapers in mumbai --you look forward to reading it  .  But  many malayalam newspapers --they  have the importance for the negative things mostly  .  And inspite of all their gory reportings the number of accidents are increasing day by day in kerala . Studies have proven that the prominent reporting of suicides especially family suicides promote copycat suicides . In the west therefore suicide reporting is regulated . In kerala with no one to monitor  this here also newspapers have their influence . In many parts of the world , womanising politicians make it into newspaper . But here too kerala newspapers lead in the number of politicians , actors , even common people allegedly  linked to a particular scandal . These things happen as much like in any other parts of the country but do not regularly make front page news
                                                Travelling to many parts of the country and a few parts of the world i have come to realise some strengths as well as some weaknesses of keralites . Compared to other parts kerala ,inspite of being Gods own country, has more than its share of people with a cynical outlook . And my question to the reader is whether the newspapers are catering to this cynical outlook or it is the newspapers causing the cynical attitude . If its the latter time to change the newspaper to a better one which even though may not show rosebeds everyday  will not show mangled remains of a car and the like .

If there is disagreement pls take last 10 days newspaper and then shoot me the comments . 

P.S : By the way i love black cats . I dont know who discovered that omen :)

Childs play

Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man.  ~Rabindranath Tagore
                                                    Today my cousin visited me and his baby was very much true to the quote by Rabindranath Tagore . He was a very friendly chap , full of life , smiling and always eager to jump into mine or my parents lap and in the four hours he was here he cried only for a minute that too a faint cry when the time was due for his dinner . I found him more well behaved than many adults .  And his friendliness was not surprising considering both his parents as well as his grandparents are one of the most friendly people i have met . So partly it is in his genes and partly in his rearing  .
                                                                 Rewind two years ago ... I was in mumbai visiting a friend of mine who was hosting a small lunch party around ten of us and one of her friend brought a baby  .  I heard him first before seeing him . No exaggeration .  The baby right from entering the flat was wailing like a siren to the moment he left the flat  .(almost an hour )  It was not a cry but a continuous siren . The explanation was thought provoking . The child was not hungry , he was not grabbed by any of the friends,  actually there was nothing wrong to provoke him .  The explanation terrified me .The baby was crying continuously according to his parents, because he is not at all used to seeing people other than his parents  except once in a few months or so when he is exposed to other people .  Now it is a well known fact that poor socialisation of kids will cause a high degree of problems in later life  .  And poor socialisation of parents is not an excuse for not socialising the kid for he will in the future become an antisocial  and at that stage there is no cure . I love kids and generally  most of them are easy to interact with because at that stage they  are direct  . They  dont keep a grudge against you , love you for what you are etc etc .  Body language plays a major role in interaction .
                                                                         Another child recently puzzled me and still remains a puzzle . He was very friendly to me whenever i saw him , talks incessantly with me,plays with me for hours  but immediately on seeing the parent  totally ignores me .  Actually this behaviour was repeated many times . I am not the one who gets upset when a child ignores me but  this behaviour was very puzzling .And the ignoring was total like the other person not existed . And mind you , this child was older than the  kid in the mumbai incident , and was academically brilliant.(the point is he knew what he was doing   )   I have seen so many kids but all of them are fairly consistent in their behaviour especially the older ones  . Definitely when parents come they devote their attention towards them but this kids behaviour was the extreme . Then i remembered once he did the same to another person when he had established a bond to me . He totally ignored that person in my presence . This is not a genetic trait but definitely an aquired one and kids learn by imitation and observation .

 There are many years to go before these children become the adults who will rule the world but though on the whole i am optimistic i am a little worried about these behaviours in kids . Cranky kids will get toned down as they reach adulthood but "wailing due to lack of adequate socialisation " and " ignoring loved ones when you get a new one "  needs early intervention to make the world a better place .
                                                                                                    
                                                                          

career choice policeman--- any takers ?

     http://news.yahoo.com/police-utah-officer-dies-following-shootout-112446228.html
                                                                        
                                                     One thing which still defies my logic is why people choose to be a policeman ?  No , i am fully aware that being a policeman definitely gives one some degree of power  over the society and though many of us are not ready to acknowledge is more useful to the society than many other professions .  And again , its not that news like above that shows that it is a high risk profession , for there are riskier professions like  mining and tree-cutters .  But police work is different  .
                                                                       For it is one field where even though many of them do their best including  staying awake while the bulk of the society sleeps , doing gruesome work sometimes like visiting the site of homicide etc .  Inspite of all that the average person has only negatives to say about policemen . For a moment  just imagine you staying awake all night even for  one day at a scene of a brutal murder and that makes this profession unique --next day get negative feedback from politician , public ,superiors , media etc of  "police botched investigation "  . etc etc .  And its not that  they are paid the highest salaries to make up for all this .  There are professions like merchant navy  where to compensate for  their months in sea salaries are quite high  .  And please dont say that many of them are corrupt for corruption is there in many professions  also .
                                                                I have not noted this trend in hollywood movies but in malayalam movies in most of them the villain either is a policeman or has great connections with policemen . And the crowd cheers when the hero bashes him up  . Havent done the statistics but  i feel the number of policemen in movies as villains outnumbers the number of politicians as villains .  And movies being an indirect reflection of the public wants shows the image of policeman in front of the public .  The media is equally  punitive for the policeman whether he does a particular intervention or doesnt do . In an ideal world police work is one of the noble professions.. a career where you have to be above average in physical and mental strength where the society is benefitted by your hard work . But in an ideal world after all these stresses the policeman will be favourably seen by the society he serves . But since that is not happened i wonder why people choose career as a policeman/woman .

P.S :  if curious please check out police career in google and get a true feel of what they  do .                                                  

the wonderful art of gifting

             A few months back i was with a friend at hyderabad . He was telling me that he was going to gift another friend of him a coat as a marriage present .This friend was of middleclass economic status and for him Rs 7000-10000 for a gift had me thinking .
Seeing my expression he explained . He further explained that he had got a coat as gift when he got married from the same friend many years back .  This got me thinking more about the process of gifting . For both these people coat was an essential part of marriage  .  Suppose both of them had just got themselves a coat each both their needs would have been satisfied . But  because both were gifted coats by each other , their needs were satisfied but  both of them got the "extra happiness" of receiving a costly gift .
                                                                              Recently on my return from China i went souvenier hunting and to tell the truth these days its difficult to buy a gift from abroad as most of the things are available in india . But shanghai didnt disappoint as they had beautiful ceramic and wooden chopstick sets , painted chinese fans etc . For my relatives i bought these , but for one of my friends i bought a nice table tennis bat .
Being a good table tennis player himself he was the one who gifted me a table tennis bat on his visit to shanghai an year back . And now he is getting a table tennis bat as a gift from me.  So here again though cheaper than the coat , we are both getting the gifts plus the "extra happiness" of the receipt of gifts .
                                                                      In my collection so far i have some gifts which have been given as toys,pens etc  so many years back . But each time i see them i remember the moment when the person gifted it to me and also the person . Now should a gift be costing 7000 like the coat or even say 100 rs plus like the pen .  No .
My fathers brother whenever he visits anybody always carries a small packet of food as gift on all his informal visits . Though we are not Pavlovs dogs to associate his arrival with food ,  this small token gift always had a special appeal to his visit . It was not the food , but that small effort to procure it and gift it inspite of he like us being as busy .
Last but not the least a question to the reader ,  in the first two cases where the coats are exchanged and the table tennis bats are exchanged the effective effort is zero . But two people got happiness as byeproduct .
In all the laws of physics energy or anything for that matter is neither created nor destroyed . Then where does this extra happiness for two people come from  ?
If you dont know the answer no problem but from now on start gifting more ...its a nice habit.

p.s : gift me a small comment if you like ...regards dr haroon marikar